Sunday, June 19, 2022

I want to die but I want to eat tteokbokki, by Baek Sehee

 

Author Baek Sehee is a successful professional in the publishing industry who grew up with an abusive father and a hypercritical mother. Internalizing the criticism, as a young woman she questioned and criticized herself to the point of depression and severe anxiety. The depression is disruptive, but not so debilitating that she does not still want her favorite foods, such as tteokbokki. After initiating therapy with a psychiatrist, Baek began to record her sessions, and the bulk of this book consists of transcriptions of discussions in which they talk about her depression and pervasive self-criticism. Baek is cringingly honest and authentic throughout. While many of Baek’s anxieties may seem trite or petty (e.g., “Is she prettier than I am?”), they interfere with her ability to live a full life. She begins each chapter with a brief essay that introduces a topic she wants to discuss with the psychiatrist and concludes each one with an essay reflecting on what she learned from the session. Chapters address topics such as honesty, self-surveillance, self-esteem, medication, physical attractiveness, and more. VERDICT This is a sincere attempt at self-discovery that will resonate with young people who suffer from similar forms of depression and anxiety. 

This review was previously published in Library Journal 147:8 (2022):106.

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